Sunday, May 24, 2009

Daisy of Love

I've been watching the Daisy of Love show and honestly it drives me up the freakin' wall. I have watched so many of these "Of Love" shows and although we know that in the end no one is really a "love" winner but in most of the competitions the competitors will actually compete.
I am so annoyed with this show because every week there is some poor insecure loser walking away from Daisy because they don't like the competition. They feel bad that she is spending time with the other dudes in the house so "Oh she must not like me cause she's spending time with the other dudes...WTF it's called Daisy of Love, when it's the boys looking for love the females are fighting for the affection of the man. At the end of the show the men get to choose who goes home, so far on Daisy of Love there hasn't been a full complete elimination. Daisy isn't getting the choice of picking who gets to leave, the boys feel as if they shouldn't have to compete for her attention. Again WTF? If a man wants a woman doesn't he go after her or excuse me shouldn't he go after her? Shouldn't he eliminate the competion with his charm, affection, presence, and love? He really should be showing her what he is capable of offering her and why she shouldn't be thinking of all the other competitors.
So let me get this straight in my world, the boys will compete when it comes to sports, drinking, strength, and whatever else they love to do but they wouldn't compete for the affection of a potential partner, hmmm interesting!! TV, music, books, and my experience is really teaching me how ridiculous it is of women to expect an unconditional love or contemplate romance in their lives because the men aren't doing it. Unfortunately the only thing that will come from the ridiculous behavior of the boys is females will start thinking with their vaginas (not their emotions) and start having the same attitude. As a woman I know that....ANYTHING YOU CAN DO, I CAN DO BETTER!!!

More Music & Women

Is the saying true?
A woman falls in love in a man's presence.
A man falls in love in a woman's absence.

I'm very curious about this because we all know the song from Beyonce who is telling the men if they liked it they should've put a ring on it. Which I don't necessarily agree with, the song should really be "If you loved me then you would've put a ring on it". Is it really true that a man waits for the woman to no longer want him before he realizes she's the one? Why gamble? I'm so intrigued by all of this men, women, relationships, feelings, and all of the crap that goes along with it. I have been single for so long and in my dating career I have come across this actually quite a few times. You do the whole dating thing and getting to know each other and all of a sudden they stop calling you. You don't know why but this is dating so you kick the dust from the last dude and continue to what seems to be the never ending cycle of dating. I am very well aware that not everyone is meant for me but I have to say that those guys that stopped calling will call, ohhh they will call, as they have on many occasions with the oh I made a mistake, I'm sorry and I've realized you are the girl for me. Well whether or not there is a ring on it I aint biting! I've been over it and in the process of being over it, I have also discovered that they weren't the men for me anyway and I'm glad they walked when they did...too bad though cause they ALMOST had a great thing.

It's really sad because who I recently discovered that I like listening to is a kid and that is Soulja Boy. I wasn't into the whole Superman thing but I am really feeling his "Soulja Girl" and "Kiss Me Through the Phone". Damn it, I was trying to steer clear of the young ones but is that who I need to date? I don't know about what your thinking but it's sad that an 18 year old can represent what grown men should be representing instead of songs like "Birthday Sex". Sorry dude I don't want your birthday sex. The guy doesn't even wanna take her to dinner. Instead he wants to give her a present that is really meant for him. Has the times resorted to my reward being "Birthday Sex"? If you can't buy me a present that shows my worth I'll be more understanding because i'm worth a lot and my worth aint birthday sex. It also saddens me that females are really jamming to this song as if they were getting a present but the reality is LADIES you are the one giving up the diamonds for the penis and is that really an even exchange?

I've added a pole to the right of the blog: Does a man fall in love in a woman's absence? Please vote ;)

Til Next Time :)

Saturday, May 23, 2009

Today I woke up and felt emotionally drained. I really couldn't explain to myself why I was feeling the way I felt. My first thought was to just lay in bed, feel sad, maybe take a sleeping pill or two so that I could just sleep my sadness away like most people tend to do but after a few moments of thinking that way I immediately changed my mind. I'm just not one to run from myself maybe others but not from myself...only cause it's kinda hard to detach my mind from my body. I've come to the conclusion that I like to nip my emotions in the butt. I like to figure out why I feel the way I feel, what triggers some of my emotions, and what I can do for myself that would make ME happy cause at the end of the day, month, year, or life I want to feel at ease with myself knowing I did what I could to the best of my knowledgeable abilities. I took a book and blanket to Flushing Meadow Park, when I got there I observed people and then completely shut them out and came into my own world and started my short afternoon journey with myself. I was able to sort through my thoughts and basically came up with some conclusions that I think will help me.

In the process I came across a few quotes today and thought I'd share them with you:

"It is not the critic who counts, not the man who points out how the strong man stumbled or where the doer of good deeds could have done better.
The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena; whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs and comes short again and again; who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions, and spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement; and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat." Teddy Roosevelt

"We all know that knowledge is power. So it's only logical that self-knowledge is self-power. The more we know about ourselves, the more effective people we'll be and the more comfortable we'll be in our own skin. Understanding what motivates us, what repels us, what we yearn for, what we need to avoid, and why we think and feel the way we do can make all the difference in the world in our physical and emotional health." Sylvia Browne

"I cannot give you the formula for success but I can give you the formula for failure, which is trying to please everybody. The Inspiration Guy

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

A Genetic Clue to Why Autism Affects Boys More

I know that there are lots of parents worried about the reason why and how autism affects kids but here is the latest on why autism affects boys more so than girls.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/time/20090520/hl_time/08599189975600

Karen, this ones for you!

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

SUICIDE

Have you ever thought of ending it all? I have. It all seems so simple. If life sucks why even live through it? Aren't we all supposed to have some type of purpose to our lives? Or is that what we are told so the suicide rate doesn't climb through the roof? I was raised in the church and have a very strong belief in God and with that I was taught that if you killed yourself you would basically just go to hell! Oh my the torture and basically that's why I haven't ended my life. I don't know about the people who don't believe in God but let's just say your wrong and he does exist...Did you just waste your short miserable life in exchange for an eternity in hell? I don't know about you but I have decided when looking at the bigger picture that I will not gamble my soul because ETERNITY is longer than 100 years (hopefully you live that long) in case you were unaware. Although we probably have all had the same thoughts at one point in time or another, THIS IS A VERY SERIOUS THOUGHT and if you are actually contemplating suicide while you are reading this, here is a link that I found that may save your life: http://www.metanoia.org/suicide/

I am a victim of knowing and loving someone who committed suicide and honestly it sucks that he ended his life the way he did. I'll call him Bob. Bob and I were together for quite some time and although I was aware that Bob had some suicidal thoughts at some points in his life, I never actually thought it was something he would really do. At the time Bob had a son, he was his mother's only child, he had a great job, he owned his apartment, he had 2 cars and of course me. Sounds great huh? Well somewhere in Bob's head something wasn't right! There were times that Bob would go through depressions but I just associated the depression with the "drama" he had in his life. There was a point that I guess deep down I knew it was very serious but I felt so helpless. This was out of my control, I knew I wasn't capable of helping but he was so against going for help. According to him it wasn't THAT serious! I fell for it, I thought "it takes a lot for someone to actually do it" and to me the situation didn't seem that bad, why would I think differently? Well maybe he didn't do it that time but about 18 months later he had actually done it!!!
I would say finding out Bob was dead at his own hands was the worst day of my life. Could I have prevented it? If I knew he was serious 18 months prior would I have stayed with him and basically babysat him his whole life? I even had the thought that if he was capable of killing himself, would he have taken me with him? To this day I can't answer most of those questions cause the reality is Bob is gone! To this day I carry burdens most don't. I can't help but think of his only child losing a father, his mother losing her only child, and the love of my life is no longer. The hardest thing about Bob committing suicide was where is his soul now? For a brief period after his death I didn't want to believe in God, at that moment I wanted to erase the thought of hell. I just couldn't comprehend that if he was tortured on earth is it fair to go straight to hell? Was God that unforgiving? I mean what if Bob really needed psychological help and he never got it, is it the same punishment whether he was sane or not? Is anyone really sane if they actually commit this act? I don't know but I just didn't want to know that the man I loved for all those years is now tortured in his after life. I could not bear for him to continue to suffer but yet while i'm suffering for his loss he quite simply was gone. No thought about his child, his mother, or me. It was easy for Bob to end it all while the rest of us just cried. While Bob's suffering was over it was just the beginning for the ones he left behind.

We all make our choices but if you choose to end your life is it possible that through all the pain you stop and think of the ones you will leave behind. If you choose to end your life, can you honestly say that you at least tried to save it first? Did you seek help? Did you talk to anyone? Go to Church? Medications? Tell me something, anything because these are the questions your victims will be asking after your gone. The questions may never get answered, mine didn't. Time does heal some of the pain but so far it hasn't completely healed me. Think about why you should be living versus not living at all...things change, situations change, people change, and God did not put something in your path that he felt you couldn't handle.

For more information on how to beat suicide or for suicidal behaviors, here are some sites:
http://suicide.com/
http://kidshealth.org/teen/your_mind/mental_health/suicide.html
http://www.save.org/
http://health.nytimes.com/health/guides/disease/suicide-and-suicidal-behavior/overview.html
http://www.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus/suicide.html

Saturday, May 16, 2009

15 Ways to Spice Up Your Love Life by Jessica Brown

The moment finally feels right: You got the kids to bed, you've slipped into something sexy that's not stained with finger paint, and then...zzz. You are conked out. For you and your partner, the lure of sleep wins out over sex yet again.

Moms rarely have time and energy in abundance, but fortunately, you don't need either to add sizzle to a sex life that might be slumping, says Lou Paget, a sex educator and the author of Hot Mamas (Doubleday Canada). Get Paget’s tips on reconnecting with your husband inside and outside the bedroom:

Make a date night:
"Married couples should never stop courting," says Paget. Pick a time and consider it a treat -- not one more thing on your to-do list. Think it's a downer to plan for sex? News flash: You basically always did. "A lot of what seemed like spontaneous sex really wasn't. You had it on dates, weekends, vacation -- times you knew it would happen," she explains. "Planned sex can still be hot sex."

Get busy anywhere but your bed:
Using the dining room table for something other than dining adds variety, but there's another reason to ditch the bedroom: "One of my new-mom clients said that she was always so tired that anytime she hit the mattress, she just wanted to sleep!" says Paget.

Try spontaneous hugging:
Try this hug hint: Sneak up behind your husband and wrap your arms around him, says Paget. "Men have 'breast receptors' all over their bodies," she says with a laugh. "Your chest feels great against his back -- it's a big turn-on."

Use the past as an aphrodisiac:
Not a fan of talking dirty? Take a stroll down your shared sexual memory lane with your husband instead. "All it has to be is 'Remember when you did X?'" says Paget. It's likely to get you a repeat performance.

Stop focusing on the big O:
"Rediscover the bases!" says Paget. Take the pressure off by seeing how good you can make each other feel without any "goal" in mind.

Surprise him in the shower:
Kids are unlikely to be suspicious of mom and dad being in the bathroom together in the morning. And if you both shampoo while you’re in there, it's a time-saver!

Dip into your kids' toy chest:
You paid for all those board games -- now use them! Make up your own rules and play to win in the strip version.

Share a fantasy:
Not only is curiosity sexy, it also has the power to shift your relationship, says Paget. "Too many people have 'psychic sex,'" she explains. "They think they know what the other person wants, when often they may be hiding the same desires."

Type up a turn-on:
Sending a racy email or text message to your husband takes seconds -- just take proper precautions if your kids can read.

Build anticipation:

As your husband is walking out the door in the morning, tell him what you can't wait to do with him that night, says Paget. (Use code words so your kids won't understand.) The two of you will feel excited all day.

Recreate your first dates:
Bring back the initial lust you felt by revisiting the spots you went to in the beginning of your relationship. Or if you've moved since then, at least bring back that level of creativity when you go out, says Paget. "The key is to pay that much attention to your mate," she explains.

Break your patterns:
If you do moves in a certain order in bed, change it up! "Or set rules, like hands or mouth only tonight," says Paget.

Get book smart:
Buy a book of new sexual positions, curl up on the couch with your husband and ask if there are some he'd like to try. "Men are used to being the ones who have to approach women, and they never forget the sting of rejection," says Paget. "He'll love it if you take initiative."

Ignore the clock:
Stop viewing sex as a nighttime activity, advises Paget. "You may be too tired to do it then anyway!" Fooling around on a Saturday afternoon while your kids play outside can be very steamy.

Get him in a lip-lock:
Daily intimate gestures are key to a sizzling sex life, says Paget, and kissing is the No. 1 thing that turns women on. "Pull him close and say, 'I adore kissing you,'" she advises.

Friday, May 15, 2009

Dating 101: The Do's and Don'ts of Text-Message Flirting

My own experience of texting has lead to serious unnecessary miscommunications so take a look and learn the so-called texting rules. Who makes this stuff up anyway?
I agree with Drew Barrymore from "He's Not That Into You", what happened to the good old days when someone called one number and they either got you at home or not. Technology has made it easier for avoiding human contact and that's no good, no good!!!

Here's the article: (For some reason I couldn't attach the link but here you go.)

Texting is the new calling, which means there's a whole new battleground for romance -- and a new set of rules to play by. Start your flirty texting education here, with advice from Debra Goldstein and Olivia Baniuszewicz, authors of "Flirtexting: How to Text Your Way to His Heart."
More Dating Articles from Glamour:


#1: DO say the words text me when you give out your number to a new guy. Giving a new guy your number and telling him to call can be iffy. Start with a text.

#2: DON'T just text "Hi." Even if the only reason you're texting him is because you're thinking about him, this kind of short and shy flirtexting typically leads nowhere.

#3: DO text him back within 24 hours. Anything beyond that reads "I'm just not that into you -- or your texts."

#4: DON'T purposely send him a "mis-text." Women tend to use this move as a way to make single men jealous. But he'll see right through your needy outreach and move his texts on to the next.

#5: DO ask him out over text. If you like him, gauge his interest by sending a light-date invite without hesitation. Try: "Don't know about you, but I predict I'll be starving after work Thursday. Dinner?"

#6: DON'T kid yourself. If he only texts you past 10 P.M., he's probably looking for an encounter you'd rather avoid. The late-night flirtexter does not want to date you. Respond at your own risk.

#7: DO use the phone on certain occasions. For instance, if he calls you and you like him, you absolutely must return the call. Texting back in response to his call reads uninterested.

#8: DON'T go overboard with abbreviations and acronyms. Things like "MTFBWU" (May the force be with you) and overzealous "LOL" usage should be reserved for texts with your tween cousin or BFF, not to a PBF (potential boyfriend).

#9: DON'T send a sensual message before you are in an exclusive relationship. Doing this puts your secret fantasies at a high risk of being forwarded to all of his male coworkers.

#10: DO learn how to send him into the friend zone. Throwing a "Buddy," "Pal," "Kiddo" or "Sport" somewhere in your texts usually accomplishes this. If he's smart, he'll take the hint. Girls interested in dating him don't typically call him "Kiddo."

#11: DON'T text your ex. This rule is especially important to remember when you're feeling lonely and vulnerable.

#12: DO send a thank-you text, post-date. Even if there were no sparks, it's just proper flirtext etiquette. But if you had the best date ever (we're talking full-on fireworks), call him the next day to say thanks. If he felt the same way, he will definitely appreciate the reassurance!

Thursday, May 14, 2009

Do Nice Guys Finish Last?

Yesterday I read an article written by another blogger called Jerks Get More Girls. I attached the article so you can read along:
http://jerksgetmoregirls.blogspot.com/2009/05/why-should-i-be-jerk-instead-of-nice.html

I don't necessarily agree with this article but most people will say it's true nice guys finish last. I don't think it's the nice guys who finishes last, it's the guy who doesn't feel secure and confident with himself that finishes last. If your a go getter then you get what you want, if not your still standing there waiting for the cheese!! Hey nice guys...women want to be proud of their men, protected, and secure. If you don't have these qualities or you don't show these qualities then she's not looking at you like the forever guy, you just became her "Mr Right Now" guy. Let's not get this twisted either, there are a lot of great females out there who have great qualities to offer men but men aren't looking for those women they too are looking for their "Ms Right Now", the difference between men and women is most women will settle for being "Ms Right Now", I know I'm not settling for that title! I also read another article that I want to share with the ladies, it's an excellent article from a guy's point of view:
http://necolebitchie.com/2009/04/03/from-a-brotha

It really bothers me that the male species thinks they know what a woman is looking for in a mate but can you blame them? Most women don't know what they want in a mate either. Men think that a woman will settle for anything because unfortunately most times they do. I started dating back in September '08 after a 2 year hiatus from the dating world and I tried the Match.com thing because I knew of many successes behind it. The experience for me was not as successful. Don't get me wrong I have met many cool people through the experience and some that I am still friends with but there was no match and do you know why? Because most of them weren't on there looking for a match, I spent money because I assumed it would be taken a little more serious but in the end I found a bunch of serial daters. I don't like to look at any experiences as a bad experience...at least I got some free food out of it! The one thing I have learned about dating is that you will figure out what you are looking for in a mate, as we get older the criteria that were are looking for in a man gets narrower and narrower and if you don't fit it then you ain't going to get with it!
The divorce rate is high because no one is taking the time to really see if two people are compatible for each other. Marriage isn't about the right now, it's about the FOREVER! People change, financial situations change, and apparently marriage has become more of an expensive dating lifestyle. Whatever happened to "Til Death Do Us Part"? and I don't mean let's kill our spouses. There is no sanctimony in marriage anymore. People want to have a huge fancy wedding but does anyone really take the time to think about what happens when the wedding is over and the marriage actually begins? Ever had a best friend or a favorite family member live with you or become a roommate? Well most times once people live together they realize they can't stand certain things about the other person and then it creates havoc in the living environment someone moves out and the friendship is now over. Well basically marriage is the same thing! You move in with your partner and all of a sudden you can't stand each other, everything they do irritates you and instead of trying to focus on the things that made you love each other, people start to focus on what they don't love and then they leave...Where in the vows did it say it's OK if they annoy you can get a divorce? If you ask anyone who has been married for a long period of time the one thing they will say is marriage is hard work! While everyone was dating they worked hard to keep their mates happy but now that your married it gives you the OK to stop all the hard work? No, you should be working harder!! I think that everything that we do in life whether it be marriage, career, parenting, traveling or just plain living requires hard work. Ed Martinez once said "I can get anyone a job, it's their job to keep it". Life requires maintenance so let's maintain!!

Til Next Time ;)

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Leaders & Followers

I was driving down College Point Blvd this morning and there is a small section where the lines in the street are hardly visible, all of a sudden the three lanes that were just all in formation became a chaotic mess. What just happened? Keep driving forward what is the problem? Why is it that when the lines in the road are not visible, people all of a sudden lose their sense of direction? Forward is forward! Makes me think about rules and the laws. Apparently when there is a line, laws, or rules MOST people will follow.
Which takes me to a whole other topic...Leaders & Followers.
Human beings wonder why there are rules, laws and a bunch of other stuff that stop them from doing what they want to do but in reality if there were no lines, no rules, no laws, no religion, no politics all there would be is CHAOS!!! I know most of you don't understand it but if your ever driving down 1st Ave in Manhattan...it's the same thing. The lines are hardly visible and all of sudden everyone is all over the freakin' place. It annoys the crap out of me I guess because I fall under the Leader category. I bypass the chaos and all of sudden everyone is behind me still trying to figure it all out. People WTF?!? If you can't make decisions for yourself stay home, what's up with all the stupidity and the deer in the headlight looks? Do followers even know what they are following most of the time or do you just kinda go with the flow? I guess now I have an even better understanding about HATERS, maybe they want to be leaders but they just don't know how -- But I'll share my secret...it's called COMMON SENSE and if you don't have any you'll be in the ass end of the pile up!

Til Next Time =)

Monday, May 11, 2009

Emotionally Deprived & Envious Individuals

Topic of the Day: HATERS

Now for the sake of my blog this is MY interpretation of a hater: an emotionally deprived and envious individual. The urban interpretation [http://urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=hater]:

  1. A person that simply cannot be happy for another person's success. So rather than be happy they make a point of exposing a flaw in that person. Hating, the result of being a hater is not exactly jealousy. The hater doesn't really want to be the person he or she hates, rather the hater wants to knock someone else down a notch.
  2. Overused word that people like to use just because someone else expresses a dislike for a certain individual.
  3. A person who feels anger and/or jealousy for someone who has succeeded in something they have worked hard for. A being who speaks badly, and/or takes negative actions in attempt to create problems for a successful person.

And so on...you get my point, we all understand what a hater is...now let's talk about them. Well let me do another thing by cut and pasting the intro to my blog since I don't think a certain individual caught it... "A place that I [Sassy Jassy] have decided I will use as my personal forum to discuss whatever I feel like talking about. Right or wrong isn't my debate because we all have a different thought process and opinion. So enjoy, have fun and please don't be offended this is just my thought process and opinions =)". Ok now I think it's clear enough so let's begin.

The other day I wrote a blog on Motherhood and it was my personal experience that I wanted to share. It doesn't mean that we all go through the same situation but if you do, hey you are not alone! Now I don't want to discourage feedback or comments, please feel free to chime in if you have a different perspective or if you just don't agree, that's cool also. When I see negative comments or direct attacks to me I am actually saddened. My first thought is "Damn what did their parents to do them to make them so hateful/angry/bitter?" Then I think "Damn it must've been something really bad like...OMG were they sexually abused? (that's been a popular choice of abuse apparently), or were they neglected? or actually beaten?" There has to be something wrong when someone attacks a person and not the situation. I'm usually sympathetic to the emotionally deprived and envious individual because it's usually the fault of their parents. Here's an example of an article I found on confidence building: http://www.bbc.co.uk/parenting/your_kids/babies_confidence.shtml.

If you read the article just a little you can see why I blame the parents and where my sympathy comes from. I'm hoping that now that you know better you'll do better in helping yourself but if you still haven't learned anything from my definitions or articles and you still want to be an emotionally deprived and envious individual you should check this out: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZxxPLDZnqwA

So now that you know how I feel about the subject I want you to know that you are ALWAYS welcome to HATE on SassyJassy.com!! I am entertained, humored, and motivated...Sassy Jassy is hungry and you are only feeding the Sass!!! If you want to argue, let's argue facts! If you don't like what I wrote, write something better! It's very simple, why HATE?

Til Next Time!!

Sunday, May 10, 2009

*******GRAND OPENING*******

******* GRAND OPENING of ShopYolie.com *******

Sassy Jassy is proud to present Yolie's exclusive line of intimate apparel at ShopYolie.com. Shop online with Yolie for this glamorous collection of LEG CANDY. Summer is around the corner and it's time we restart accessorizing our beautiful legs.

I had the pleasure of working with Yolie for the website and here is a behind the scenes shot of Sassy Jassy & Yolie {aka Betty Booty}:



Yolie is a great friend of mine and I've seen the hard work and effort she has put into her line and into ShopYolie.com, I wish her nothing but success with the launching of ShopYolie.com!!!

Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Motherhood

When I woke up this morning to my lovely Mason I was unaware that pending events were in store for me so as usual I woke up, served Mason his strawberry milk and green apple, and made some coffee. I turned the television on and started watching Maury Povich (I remember when Migna and I used to play hookie just to go see Maury -- the memories) and he made me aware of today being the 8th Annual National Day to Prevent Teen Pregnancy -- who knew?? The show had the typical teenagers who are the toughest girls that don't have any respect for themselves let alone their mothers. These girls were trying to get pregnant because they all wanted babies to love them. They didn't care who they were having sex with and they weren't using protection. These were little girls...I mean you had a 13 year old come out with a pacifier in her mouth and she wanted 3 kids by the time she was 16?!?!?!?!?!? Well of course they sent them to Baby Boot Camp and made them care for real live babies for 24 hours, these girls left that house not wanting to know crap about babies or being a mother!
My point to the story is MOTHERHOOD is a difficult task, don't get me wrong if you have nothing else to do, if you have a maid, if you have a cook, if you don't have to work, and don't enjoy spending time alone or with others than being a mother is probably the perfect thing to do or be. But in my reality I have things to do, I don't have a maid, I don't have a cook, and I really enjoy having alone time and spending time with others. I am fortunate to not have to work at the moment so I spend quality time with Mason usually day and night! But I have endured some rough moments being a Mom to Mason. Mason is a wonderful, smart, intelligent 2 year old who started walking at the nice ripe age of 7 months old, I have been living through the terrible 2 stage for the past 17 months and Mason hasn't even turned 2. I won't speak for anybody else but I will speak for myself being a mother is the crappiest job I ever had, I wanna call out sick people but damn it I wake up and my job is waiting for my eyes to open. I don't even have a chance to wake up let alone brush my teeth before I am running to the kitchen for milk and food, then ughhh changing that dirty nasty diaper yet again -- who wants breakfast after that? Depending on the morning maybe I get to lay down for another 20-30 minutes and give my brain the time to catch up with everything that has just occured but then there are other days that there just isn't time for any brain activity and hey maybe I'll survive! That's just the first 30 minutes of my day I have a whole day left!
Paid jobs are usually 8 hours with a lunch break and a paycheck...being a mom never ends, you may eat a meal on occasion and there is no paycheck at the end of the week. So if your a teenager reading this, these are the truths behind the scenes:
  • It's not easy.
  • Babies don't know how to love so they are not going to love you, they will take your love, your food, your diapers, your sanity, and anything else valuable!!
  • Babies will not fill your void!!!
  • Abuse is illegal!
Actually if you are a teenager reading this you shouldn't even be having sex, pregnancy and babies are a huge responsibility but let's not forget the diseases being spread by having unprotected sex...but I guess they have a whole other day for that.

I don't want to be a mom that complains about how rough being a mother is but I feel that I have heard so many GREAT things about being a parent but I feel like people are just full of crap. Nobody wants to feel like they are being a bad parent because they want a break from the job that never ends but you need it! Even when I get paid to work I still want a schedule, days off, and vacations so why can't I be entitled to those things because I am a mom? Why do I have to feel bad because I want a break from my child? Well in case you didn't notice I don't feel bad...I love Mason soooooo much, he is a great child, he is smart, he is handsome, he is charming, he is loving --- he is so so loving BUT he can also be messy, destructive, violent, and a stunt man and guess what? I still need that break and I am not going to feel bad! It keeps me sane to know that I am being real with myself, it keeps me humble to know I can't do it alone so I am grateful for my family who is so supportive, it keeps me from injuring my child that I know at the end of the week there is a break waiting for me and guess what...MASON IS THE HAPPIEST BABY I KNOW, I must be doing something right but I really won't know until the results are revealed when he is his own man. Anyway I'm tired and the brain has shut down!

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Music & Women

I'm sitting at home listening to some music and really really listening to the words and unfortunately I have lots to say.
First of all the song "She Got Her Own"...talk about a direct message to the women out there, I think it's more reverse psychology but hello ladies these men are trying to make us feel as if they are empowering our independence when all they are saying is "Hey Ladies if you got your own then I don't have to provide for you". I remember when I was a kid and my mom used to tell her daughters that we should be independent so that we don't have to rely on a man to take care of us...Well the reason she was giving us this advice was to protect ourselves, it was because men may provide for his family today but if he decides to walk away he takes his money with him. Women back in the day relied so much on men that when the men walked away the women had nothing of their own!! Somewhere along the lines this message has been misconstrued and somehow now men feel like if women have their own then they do not have to take care of their responsibilities. The worse part about this is women still give men what they want and now they don't even have to work for it! The women today without realizing it have abolished the dating/courting process. Men feel like they are entitled to our bodies after a couple of dates and we all know we shouldn't be giving anything away for free and that's where I will talk about "Blame It"...they want us to give it away for free or with no conscience and then they basically say "hey don't feel bad about it just blame it on the alcohol". HELLLOOOO....Ladies reclaim it, it's called the Power of the P*ssy...and we have POWER!!! How about the song "Heartless"...ugh there is one stupid line that explains the whole song..."Hey yo, I did some things but that's the old me"...WTF??? Hello that's why she's heartless! Let's not play a song about how women can be so cold when they learned the game that the men have been playing for centuries!!
Anyway I have a lot more to say but then my dinner is going to burn, til next time!!

Wednesday, June 4, 2008

Men, what men?

So here I sit - single and wondering if the right man is ever going to appear in my life. I've tried to remain positive about love and romance but can't help to feel as though what I am looking for in a mate will remain a silhouette in my mind. I've already done the lowering of standards because maybe "they were just too high" and settling because maybe the man for me is now dead but I was wrong as I have been on many occasions when it comes to the opposite sex. I've come up with the conclusion that as low as my standards may go there still hasn't been a man to fulfill the criteria of just being a man. I might as well just own a dog, even be the old lady with millions of cats - at least they have some loyalty. Males are so quick to have the expectation of a woman who cooks, cleans, takes care of all the responsibilities of the house, manages/cares for the children, and still continue to work because of financial difficulties in this day and age. They all want their "mommies" in their woman but damn it what happened to the days when the "daddies" actually handled their responsibilities of taking care of their families? I know most people haven't had daddies that have taken care of their families but I am one of the fortunate ones that did! Males have been failing all over the place when it comes to their duties but yet the image of a women is forced to remain the same, huh?!?!?

I am a woman who is capable of paying the rent, buying the food, clothing my child, taking care of my child, being loyal, I feed the cat, I pay the utility bills and much, much more! But yet I have to lower my standards because I have yet to meet a man that can do the same! We as women make to many excuses for the poor excuses of the males we attempt to call MEN. Women need to start raising their expectations of their partners or potential partners because if woMAN came from man then why are the WOMAN able to be so much more successful in taking care of OUR responsibilities all by ourselves then these males we call men? It's because their mommies continue to baby them, the ladies accept it, and simply because we make to many excuses because "they have potential"...damn it WE ALL HAVE POTENTIAL we just choose whether or not we will use it to our advantage!!! It's so frustrating and I'm just not going to take it anymore! The males need to step it up past the dog house level and give us something to fight for!!